Santa Singh Got His Appointment Letter....

Santa Singh sent his bio data to America to apply for a post in Microsoft. A few days later he got this reply:- Dear Mr. Singh, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone call shall be entertained. Thanks

Santa singh jumped with joy on receiving this reply. He arranged a party and when all the guests had come, he said Bhaiyon aur Behno,aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki mujhay america mein naukri mil gayee hai." Everyone was delighted. Santa singh continued Ab main aap sab ko apnaa appointment letter padkar sunaongaa par letter english main hai isliyen saath-saath hindi main translate bhee kartaa jaongaa.

Dear Mr. Singh-----pyare singh sahab

You do not meet----aap to miltay hee naheen ho

our requirement----humko to zaroorat hai

Please do not send any furthur correspondance----ab letter vetter bhejnay kee zaroorat nahee hai.

No phone call ----phone vone kee bhee zaroorat nahee hai

shall be entertained----bahut khaatir kee jayegi.

Thanks----aapkaa bahut bahut shukriya

So funny...... :)

Ravan- Sigret hai kya?
Hanuman- Nahi
Ram- 1 packet hai na de do.
Hanuman- Aap chup rahiye prabhu.
Saale ke 10 sir hai pura packet khatam kr jayega..!

   

Ramu apne 16 bachho or biwi k sath dost k ghar lunch pe gaya.
Dost ne itni badi family dekh kar gusse mein kaha: Lajja nahi aayee.
Ramu: Nahi uska exam hai…

    

IIT exam,
Santa got 1 question.

Prove
Sin x = 6n
Santa cancelled ‘n’ from both the sides.
Then
six=6
&
wrote:
“Kuch to standrd rakha karo IIT k ques ka"

    

Ek aadmi ko ye sunkar sadma lag gaya..
Jab uski kaam walli bai ne kha..!!

?

?

?

?

Sahab!
Orkut pe muje bhi add karlo!!

    

Santa- Mere 3 bete Engineer ban gaye lekin ek kambakht DAKU ban gaya.
Banta- To usko ghar se nikal do.

Santa- Yahi to problem hai kamakar b sala wahi lata hai….

    

Father to his son- How was the paper?

Son- bas pehla sawal chut gaya.

Father- acha,aur baki?

Son- 3rd mujhe ata nahi tha,
4th main karna bhul gya,
5th mujhe nazar nahi aya nd 6th paper ki pichli taraf tha meine dekha nahi.

Father gusse me bola- aur 2nd ques?

Son- bas sirf wahi galat hua hai!

   

Jokes... :)

Santa Ped Pe Baithke Ga Raha Tha,Achanak Banta Bhi Ped Se Ulta Latak Ke Gaane Laga,

Santa :Ulta Kyo Latka He.

Banta :Side B Ga Raha Hu.

Driver : "Sardar Ji",

"Petrol Khatam Ho Gaya hai",

"Gaadi Aage Nhi Jaa Sakti.."

Sardar : "Oh yaar",

Chal fir", "wapis mod le"..

More Jokes.....

Tring...............

Tring...............

Tring................

Sardar : Hello kon bol raha hai

Other side : Ji Main bol raha hoon

Sardar : oye ye to kamal ho gya

idhar se bhi Main Uthar Se Bhi Main.

      

Shadi mein santa bahut der se khana kha raha tha.

Ek aadmi ne puchha kab tak khaoge?

Santa : mein to khaa khaa kar tang ho gya hun, lekin card mein likha tha lunch 2 se 4 tak. 

 

Munna: ye Gandhi Bapu
har note me haste hi
kyu rehte hei ??                                                      
                                                                  
Circuit: Simple hai
...BHAI, Royenge to note
geeela ho jayenga na.    

                                                                                                        

Boss Will Be Always BOSS...................

 

Jokes...........

Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.
MANAGER: Do U know MS Office?    
SARDAR: If U give me the address I will go there sir.                             

SARDAR:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"?
FRIEND:- Main jaa raha hun.
SARDAR:- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 20 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..

SARDAR JI: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai.
Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani le aao, woh le aati hai,
DOST: Garam pani Q?
SARDAR: Garam pani se Bartan Achay Dhultay hain.

TEACHER - Batao sabse jada nasha kis cheez me hota hai ?
BANTA - Books me..!!
TEACHER - Vo Kaise..??
BANTA - Kholte hi neend aa jati hai...!!

BIWI ka antim sanskar karke pati ghar ja raha tha
aachanak BIJLI chamki.........
BADAL garje.............
TOOFAN aaya.........
BARISH hui.........

dukhi PATI bola

"lagta hai
pahuch gayi "

TEACHER: Aaj tum late kyu aaye?
School 7 baje shuru hota he.
KID: Madam,
Aap meri fikar mat kia karo,
School shuru karwa dia karo.

Laloo ki English Training.....

Laloo ji Bush se 1 monthEnglish ki training leke India wapas aye.

1 din phone aya,

Laloo ji says,"who's speaking?"

Dusri taraf se jawab aya.

"Are Hum Sasura Bushwa Bol Rha hoon."

Sholey-2

Gabbar sends Kaalia and two others to Ramgad to

Collect the loot-maar software he had ordered.

They reach Ramgad and start shouting: "Abe O thakur!

Kahan hai wo loot-maar software? Last date to kab ka

nikal gaya".

Thakur [with anger]: "Chillao mat! Jaakar Gabbar se

kah do ki Thakur

Software walon ne paagal kutton ke liye software

banana bund kar diya

hai."

Kaalia: "Bahoot garmi dikha rahe ho thakur? Koi naye

programmers hire

kiye hain kya?"

Thakur: "Nazar uttha ke dekh, Kaalia, tere sar par

powerbuilder chal

raha hai."

Kaalia looks up and sees Viru (Dharmendra) working

on a PC on one

Water tank and Jay (Amitabh) on another, using a

laptop. Kaalia Starts

Laughing and says: "Ha ha... thakur ne freshers ko

liya hai ye log

Programming karenge? In ko to DOS commands bh! i

nahin aate."

Veeru shouts: "Chup-chaap chala ja kutte. Hum log

consultants hain,

Kuch bhi kar sakte hain."

Jay hits some commands on his keyboard, then says:

"jaao kaalia, Gabbar se kahna ki uska

server down ho gaya."

***** AT GABBAR'S DEN...

******

Gabbar: "Kitne bugs the?"

Kaalia: "Do sarkaar."

Gabbar: "Wo do! Aur tum teen. Phir bhi fix nahi kar

sake? Kya soch

Keya aye ho? Gabbar bahoot khush hoga?

Naya assignment dega aur increment bhi? Iski saza

milegi... barobar

milegi."[Snatches an X terminal from Sambaa]."Kitne

sessions hain is

machine mein?"

Sambaa: "Chhey sarkaar."

Gabbar: "Session chhey aur programmer teen. Bahoot

naainsaafi

hai.[logout - logout - logout]. Haan ab theek hai...

ab tera kya hoga

Kaalia?"

Kaalia: "Sarkaar, maine aapka code likha tha."

Gabbar: "To ab documentation kar!"

Yamraj Joke.......

A MAN WAS SLEEPING IN HIS HOUSE. SUDDENLY YAMARAJ APPEARED & SAID, "GO OUT & ENJOY. NOTHING WILL HAPPEN TO YOU FOR THE NEXT 10 YEARS." 
HE DID SO & MET WITH AN ACCIDENT & DIED.

ON THE WAY TO HEAVEN IS THE HELL....SAW YAMARAJ WHISTLING N RELAXING.
HE ASKED YAMRAJ, WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME.

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